FR for 10/25/2008 – Daygame
Extreme Daygame Day #8
Today was an interesting day. I spent about 2pm-8pm out around union square, doing daygame and other things. What was interesting is that I’ve reached a tipping point of sorts – I know what is going wrong with my game and what needs to be done. I have also been able to call myself out on a point of self-deception (which is always a scary yet relieving feeling when I do it).
As a sidenote, I am still sick and my voice wasn’t all that great during the day (and even worse at night – see the FR for nightgame), but I tried.
But first, the sets.
HBStar
Set: Yes, her name was Star. I felt like I was screaming but all my vocal projection came out really soft. She had trouble hearing me, and I had to repeat things a few times. I found out a bit about her but I didn’t get that sense that it was going anywhere – the set was not hooking and she was not really giving anything back, so I left.
Good stuff: Opened, tried to talk loudly.
Bad stuff: Ejected.
Where I lost the set: When I left.
Things to do differently: Kept on ploughing, stacking forward into frames and other pieces of material.
HBWeird
Set: Over at the Square, she looked like she was searching for someone. Standard open, tap-and-spin, direct. She gave me a blank stare. I ploughed a little, pacing her situation (looking for someone). She looked irritated. I told her “hey” to get her to stop and actually pay attention and she told me it was weird that I was talking to strangers (???) and walked off. As an interesting note, just looking over my FRs this is the first time I’ve been blown out by a white girl for daygame (every other time I’ve left the set myself).
Good stuff: Opened. Ploughed a bit.
Bad stuff: Nowhere near high energy enough or loud enough to hook her attention just from opening. Not ploughing more.
Where I lost the set: Where she said it was weird to talk to strangers (I admit, that one threw me off balance) and walked off.
Things to do differently: Open high energy with a funner vibe. More early kino to get her to stop. Be super-enthusiastic.
Girl on a mission
Set: In the mall. Ran down the escalators to catch up to her. She was holding things in both hands. Stopped her, went direct. She liked it. We walked and talked a bit, she said she was on a mission shopping. I teased her for it, then force framed it as her going for what she wants in life (note to self: need to reward her slightly when laying this frame out there). She kept on walking and I ejected.
Good stuff: Opened. Stacked forward. Force framing. High energy vibe.
Bad stuff: Leaving set too early. Not locking it. Walking – James Bond actually asked why we started walking. I have always rationalised it as the girl looked like she was about to start walking so I walked first to make it look like I was leading. However, more recently I am thinking that this is not always a good idea (especially after watching him, Alchemist and Derek P in set). From now on, I am not going to start walking again if the girl stops to talk to me – I am remaining stationary.
Where I lost the set: Arguably by ejecting but also arguably when I started walking again.
Things to do differently: Not starting to walk again. Locked in against the barrier. Started a sexual framing routine. Offered to hold one of her bags to get in extra kino. Gone for the number close (probably Soul’s “I don’t want to go shopping with you, but…” line).
HBCute
Set: Cute white girl sitting by herself on some steps. Walked over directly, making eye contact as I approached. Opened with a friendly and warm “Hi”. Told her she was adorable (she was), sat down, chatted a bit. Did a cold read and set a decision-making frame. Talked a bit more. Then did the world’s worst number close (done entirely as statements in up-speak no less). She actually took my number, and was about to leave but I insisted that she dial me and I save her name in my phone. I don’t think that this made the number any more solid though (that and she wouldn’t give me her last name so I could find her on facebook, hmmm).
Good stuff: Opened. Went direct. Did the cold read and frame setting. Went for the number close.
Bad stuff: Poor number close routine. Could have done a bit more kino. Could have teased her more.
Where I lost the set: I didn’t.
Things to do differently: More kino. Sat closer to her. More teasing. Stronger number close. Maybe set a roleplaying frame.
General observations and calling out self-deception
My general feeling about the past few weeks of gaming is that I am actually going BACKWARDS in my daygame. Before I could pull off number closes and instant-dates fairly easily… now it seems like I can do neither. Here are some reasons why.
Just looking over my past week of FRs, I have noticed a recurring pattern: leaving set too early. I am therefore going to go out from now on with the notion that I will not leave a set until either 1) the girl runs away, or 2) she blows me out (tells me to fuck off). I am to stay in the set, and plough plough plough until something happens.
I have tried to find out WHY I am leaving set early – in most cases, it is a subtle shift in the vibe that makes me leave the set. The opening vibe is as it always is – fun and exciting. But when the vibe start to go “stale”, I leave. And by stale I feel like I am throwing a lot of things out there, but the girl is not giving anything back at all. I am rationalising this as me getting bored and frustrated that I am putting myself out there and delivering value and the girl is too LSE/messed up/unaware/socially uncalibrated/whatever to see that and respond. The problem with this rationalisation is that it assumes that I am looking for a reaction from the girl to continue the set. And this is bad. So, there needs to be some inner game work done here. And of course, my new rule above (plough until I am blown out) kinda fixes this from an outer game perspective. But I still do wish that I understood more about why certain sets go stale.
The other thing I am seeing more too is that I’m not stacking into my additional material properly. To correct this, I need to do some practice in terms of delivering it and in different ways of combining it to make the delivery smoother in-field.
Watching JB in field has also made me realise yet another crucial piece which used to be in my game but is now missing: I no longer chase girls (with energy and FURY). So… next time I am out and I see a girl, I am gonna jump (figuratively) and chase after her. RUN after her if necessary and open with gusto and energy.
Actions to take
- When in field: chase girls, run every set until blown out.
- Refine and practice delivery of material at home to get it right.
- Inner game work on needing some reaction out of the girl.
- whim
